What is it like to learn that your ordinary, loving father is a serial killer?
In 2005, Kerri Rawson heard a knock on the door of her apartment. When she opened it, an FBI agent informed her that her father had been arrested for murdering ten people, including two children. It was then that she learned her father was the notorious serial killer known as BTK, a name he’d given himself that described the horrific way he committed his crimes: bind, torture, kill. As news of his capture spread, Wichitacelebrated the end of a thirty-one-year nightmare.
For Kerri Rawson, another was just beginning. She was plunged into a black hole of horror and disbelief. The same man who had been a loving father, a devoted husband, church president, Boy Scout leader, and a public servant had been using their family as a cover for his heinous crimes since before she was born. Everything she had believed about her life had been a lie.
Written with candor and extraordinary courage, A Serial Killer’s Daughter is an unflinching exploration of life with one of America’s most infamous killers and an astonishing tale of personal and spiritual transformation. For all who suffer from unhealed wounds or the crippling effects of violence, betrayal, and anger, Kerri Rawson’s story offers the hope of reclaiming sanity in the midst of madness, rebuilding a life in the shadow of death, and learning to forgive the unforgivable.
“No easy answers here. No platitudes. Only raw honesty, written with the gracious authority of one who has glimpsed hell. Kerri Rawson shares her earned wisdom and a hope that has been bought with tears and nightmares. This book is a gritty must-read in the library of hope.”
—Paul J. Pastor, author of The Face of the Deep and The Listening Day
|Publisher:||Nelson, Thomas, Inc.|
|Sold by:||HarperCollins Publishing|
|File size:||7 MB|
About the Author
Kerri Rawson is the daughter of Dennis Rader, better known to the world as the serial killer BTK. Since her father's arrest, Kerri has been an advocate for victims of abuse, crime, and trauma, sharing her journey of hope, healing, faith, and forgiveness. She lives with her husband, two children, and two cats in Michigan.
Table of Contents
Author Note viii
Prologue: Stubbornness Might Be Enough ix
Part I Hold On to Your Foundations
1 What Doesn't Kill You 3
2 Believe in Good Beginnings 9
3 Hope for Happily Ever After 14
4 Weave Among the Pines Like a Tomboy 20
5 Go Comet Hunting in the Winter 26
6 Have Adventures, Because Life Is Fragile 31
7 Allow Yourself to Grieve 35
8 Attempt to Outrun What Haunts You 42
9 … Makes You Stronger 47
Part II Make Your Way Through the Wilderness
10 Know and Respect Your Limitations … Yeah, Right 57
11 Miscalculations of the Ego Can Be Deadly 66
12 The Milky Way Makes an Excellent Nightlight 74
13 Find a Stream in the Wasteland 80
14 If It's Good Enough for Tadpoles, It's Good Enough for You 87
15 Coming Back from the Abyss Doesn't Have to Be So Dramatic 93
Part III Love Will Never Fail You
16 Find a Hope and a Future 101
17 Fall in Love at Least Once in Your Life 105
18 Make a Place of Your Own 110
19 Head Down the Wedding Aisle, Even If You Have to Hobble 116
20 Some Carpet Cleaners Can Leave Unexpected Results 121
21 Don't Say Goodbye-Say "See Ya in a While" 125
Part IV When All Else Has Fallen Away
22 Offer the FBI Your DNA-It's Just Easier That Way 136
23 All Reality Can Sometimes Be Lost 143
24 Don't Google for an Alibi 150
25 Media Circuses Belong in Big Tops, Not Apartments 156
Part V Seek Refuge
26 Respite Can Be Found Thousands of Feet in the Air 165
27 There is Safety in Numbers 171
28 Maybe Love Is Enough 181
29 Leave the Crime Solving to the Experts 187
30 Light Will Overcome the Darkness 194
Part VI Stand on Your Rock
31 Long Distance Can Offer Sanity 203
32 At Some Point You Have to Face Your Fears Head-On 211
33 Most Folks Are Good and Intend You No Harm 217
34 Fight for Those You Love 224
35 Refuse to Let the Bad Stuff Win 229
36 Try to Hold On to the Good Times 236
37 Truth and Justice Can Hurt 244
38 175 Years Is a Long Time 251
Part VII Binding Up a Broken Heart
39 Keep Faith in the Good 261
40 A Desert Is a Great Place to Hide 270
41 PTSD Blows Chunks 278
42 Therapy Might Just Save Your Life 286
43 Laugh or Cry to Survive 293
44 Grit Your Teeth and Keep Going 301
45 Put Your Armor On 305
46 Try to Forgive 313
Epilogue: On the Good Days 318
About the Author 326
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
I bought this because I saw it on the Today show (I think I bought out of curiosity) but really didn't expect to like it. I was wrong. No unnesessary gore or violence....very sad but quite well written, I thought. He might have been your next door neighbor or mine! Yikes! ..Well written by his daughter....Do you know who lives in your house?
I think Kerri did a great job in this book. It showed her many years of struggles from this enormous wrong. It is wonderful that she turned to God all the way through so she could come to a place of forgiveness and help her to enjoy her beautiful life with her family.
I live in Wichita, my husband is from Park City, so hit even closer to home. My heart broke for this family watching these events unfold in real time. The book fills in the wondering we all had how his family coped. Thank you Kerri, you are one of the bravest people I know. I know that sting of death she described as her whole life as she knew died in an instant, as I lost my father suddenly to a heart attack. I also was daddy's girl, his little buddy...and even though circumstances were quite different in the manner of loss, it still separates a life in two. Thank you again Kerri for sharing your faith, it softened my heart a little towards the Lord.
Helps you see and understand a perspective that is really hard to grasp...her side of things. The pain she felt after finding out her father is BTK is real...no disrespect towards victims intended. He is her father who happens to be a monster. Good read.
Great read !
This book is wonderful~ Kerri put a lot of time and thought into writing this story of HER life! This book is not the place to find gory details etc. It's just not here! Their camping trip was enjoyable for me. So much so, I actually got online and searched for photos of all the stops they made inside the Grand Canyon trail. I was on the edge of my seat, holding my breath as she was walking in the extreme heat up next to the walls to keep from falling off. Also, the anticipation waiting for her brother to get to them. This book is so much better than I thought it would be. I feel like Kerri is a friend of mine now. I know her, now. I feel some of what she felt. She is a victim too, her entire family is. I just cannot wrap my head around living with this day after day. I do think this book is Therapeutic for her.
This is such a sad story. This was a truly inconceivable story. When we watch the stories of Serial Killers, we forget that they not only have parents, but some may even have children. This is the story Kerri Rawson tells of her life with her father Dennis Lynn Rader, the BTK Killer (Bind, Torture, Kill) He killed ten innocent people, two of them being children over three decades. During this time, he is the head of a family. Loving to his wife, Paula; to bring his daughter Kerri “to ease” when she needed to be soothed, and caring to his son, Brian. Kerri was never uncertain of her father’s love for her. While she struggles with her faith throughout her life because their family suffers so much loss and their grief is huge, she tells us the story about how she dealt with her life and how her father seemingly dealt with the same circumstances. You learn that the BTK Killer left behind more then ten victims. His entire family suffered the consequences of his actions. The question is; will they recover?
I recently watched the 20/20 episode on BTK and saw the tv movie years back which prompted me to read Kerri's book. This woman has amazing courage and strength. My heart and prayers go out to her and her family.
A thought provoking read.
This review was written for NetGalley and Nelson Book. I received a free copy for an honest review. What is it like to learn that your ordinary, loving father is a serial killer? Kerri Rawson writes an insightful and honest perspective of another side of her father, the BTK killer. She relates her growing up years with her father and shows a couple of traits that could have been clues but also shows a man of master deception. I was happy to see how supportive her husband was and how he helped her to overcome her PTSD and gave her the courage to go on with her life. I found the book hard to put down and I would recommend it to those who love true crime stories.
As a reader readers I think this title is misleading. Yes Kerri is the daughter of a serial killer but this story lacks the true crime story line was promoted to readers. The story lacks focus and long winded stories. The story is more about Kerri Childhood and when she found out about her father being a serial killer but moves quickly though parts of the history quickly when true crimes would be more focus on the crimes instead of her memories. If this story was promoted more as a religious memoir I think the author would be able to find a different audience. Thank you Netgalley and publisher Thomas Nelson for Kerri Rawson A Serial Killers Daughter.
A Serial Killer’s Daughter: My Story of Faith, Love, and Overcoming I approached this book with my mind and feelings completely open and was really surprised how much I came away with from it. Kerri Rawson is fresh and likable as she tells her story of growing up in her family in Kansas. She describes it as just a totally normal, semi-dysfunctional family who works, goes to school, has vacations. Pretty typical family, it seems. She comes across very real as she shares her story and I find it like reading something a friend could be relating about what a really awful period in their life was like. The situation is just so unimaginable, and I just felt horrible for Kerri and her family, and all of the families. It gets a little bit repetitive on a few things, the spiritual theme, and other items that come up repeatedly perhaps after a while, but if that helped her get through all of what she describes well, more power to her. What I didn’t expect were some of the stories of situations she ended up in growing up with her dad that turned harrowing that she shares. In hindsight, she, of course, sees them differently after she learns of his killing past. I found this book better than I expected and well laid out. I’m glad I purchased this very heartfelt book, as it told so much more than just the BTK aspect of the family. They became real people to me by the midst of the book, not just headlines, due to her writing.